Got this from my new friend John who calls himself a meantime guy and he thinks I am one too (tama ba? Does he really think I am one or was he asking me if I am one? sorry labo ko). Anyway I guess I am a meantime girl, not entirely according to what was enumerated below, ilan lang naman kase dun ang kaya ng powers ko. I can recall clearly that I have been a meantime girl to one friend then another so sa 2 lang sila and they both are special to me that I didn’t mind hanging out with them. I have been a shock absorber, match maker, coffee companion, movie partner, textmate, chatmate, phone pal, CD/MP3 player and even a walking encyclopedia slash walking search engine. Pero as the meantime girl concluded, she’s not always around all the time, it happened to me also. Not that I got tired, perhaps I just couldn’t make it anymore. That was I guess the time when I realized that I deserve to be happy and have my own meantime guy (hehehe ang mean).
So moving on, in our life we have meantime buddies, who invented this situation by the way? Share ko sa inyo, this is nice.
She’s the one you call when you’re bored coz she makes you laugh.
She’s the one you talk to when you’re feeling down coz she’s willing to lend an ear and be a friend.
She’s not the one you call when you need a date to your company’s xmas party, or to go dancing with on a Sat night.
She’s the one you spend time with between girlfriends, before you find “The One".
You know, the one who you keep around in the meantime.
She’s one of the guys, not a tomboy, but you don’t look at her as a “real" woman, either.
She’s not bitchy enough, moody enough, or sexy enough to be seen in that light.
She’s too laidback, too easily amused by the same things your male buddies are amused by.
She’s too understanding, too comfortable she doesn’t make you feel nervous or excited the way a "real" woman does.
But she’s cool, & nice, & funny, & attractive enough that when you’re lonely or horny & need intimate female companionship, she’ll do just fine.
You don’t have to wine and dine her coz she knows the real you already, & you don’t have any facades to keep up, no pretenses to preserve.
You’re not trying to get anything of substance out of her.
She’s not easy, but you know that she cares about you and is attracted to you, & that she’ll give you the intimacy you need.
And you know you don’t have to explain yourself or the situation, that shell be able to cope with the fact that this isn’t the beginning of a relationship or that there’s any possibility that you have any real romantic feelings for her.
It won’t bother her that you’ll get up in the morning, put on your pants, say goodbye, and go on a date with the woman you’ve been mooning over for weeks who finally agreed to go out with you.
She’ll settle for a goodbye hug and a promise to call her and tell her how the date went.
She’s just so cool . . . why can’t all women be like that?!
But deep down, if you really think about it (which you probably don’t because to you, the situation between the two of you isn’t important enough to merit any real thought), you know that it’s really not fair.
You know that although she'd never say it, it hurts her to know that despite all her good points and all the fun you two have, you don’t think she’s good enough to spend any real time with.
Sure, it’s mostly her fault, because she doesn’t have to give in to your needs she could play the hard-to-get bitch like the rest of them do, if she really wanted to.
But you and she both know that she probably couldn’t pull it off.
Maybe she’s too short, or a little overweight, or has a big birthmark on her forehead, or works at Taco Bell.
Whatever the reason, somehow life has given her a lot of really great qualities but has left out the ones that men want (or think they want) in a woman.
So she remains forever the funny friend, the steadfast companion, the secret lover, and you go on searching for your goddess who will somehow be everything you ever wanted in a woman.
You’ll joke to her that she should be the best man at your wedding, & shell laugh and make a joke about a smelly rental tux.
She doesn’t captivate you with her beauty, or open doors with her smile.
Mainly she blends in with the crowd.
She’s safe.
She doesn’t want to be the center of attention and turn the heads of everyone in the room.
But she wants to turn someone’s head.
She wants to be special to someone, too.
We all do.
She has feelings.
She has a heart.
In fact, she probably has a bigger and better heart than any woman you’ve ever known because she’s had a front-row seat to The Mess That Is Your Life, & she likes you anyway.
She obviously sees something worthwhile & redeeming in you because although you’ve given her nothing, absolutely no reason to still be around, she is.
Yeah, I’m a Meantime Girl.
Been one, more times than I care to admit.
I don’t know the reason, really & at this point I don’t even care.
I just want to let every guy know who’s ever had the good fortune to have a Meantime Girl that we may be a lot of fun, but we cry, too, a lot.
And someday we'll not be around
2 comments:
I've read that essay before and I can totally relate. It's fun and sad at the same time, but, ganun talaga ang buhay. You can't force an attraction. It hurts but we do deserve something, or rather, someone better.
I agree, :-)
Thanks for reading this & for commenting, it's nice to know what other girls think about this.
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